[Rivers] While listening to the new Giant (aka the Old Spirit) located on the marge of the Wainfleet Bog an irritating voice drifted through my morning slumber. In an instant I sat bolt upright in bed - much to Jan's dismay - and shouted "Wonder Falls" is comming out on DVD - all four episodes! [reviews, reviews, reviews] And they go on and on and on and on and on . . . How could we have missed this I'm sure there's a VirgilON subplot lurking there! And if not what about "Niagara Motel"? Caroline Dhavernas who played Jaye Tyler in "Wonder Falls" is back!

Is there a convergence with VirgilON here!?!?!?!? I think yes!

We also have to draw a connection between VirgilON and the defeated Southerners who flocked to the northern end of the Underground Railway in the "Southern Tier" of Welland County after the "War Between the States" to found the imposing edifices of "Solid Comfort" and other summer reteats on Lake Erie - beyond the domain of those "yankee carpetbaggers". Did they aid and abet the "Underground Railway" so they could have trained servants in the "Dominion"? I wonder.

[Miller] Wow, a parallel reality. Wonder Falls, and here we are with Bill Bellissimo caught in suspension at the Falls. I had been sensing "something" weird about this blog for some time but I thought it was the ghosts of Seinfeld or Cheers. It has some of their chemistry for sure, but but but but.

Blog on noble volunteers. I think Brock said that.

We need plot developers-

 Where the hell is Bill. Maybe there really is a Viril Motel
   Mother got fucked by the Variance Board - she deserves a day at the OMB
     Meesh, oh don't get me started on Tecumseh's grave
        Mother's latest idea as a chicken falls from the sky
           Lil hooks up with a realty upstart Revin O'Donnel
              The Mennon Boys find a dynamite cache in the old mill

[Alan] ...does Mother Teresa go to the heritage board before the OMB?...

[Leah] Certainly, if she wants to designate her wonder building for its architectural/historical significance.

[Miller] Stumpy Stump's letter to the Heritage Board was read aloud at the end of the first cribbage game. It usually took four to six games before the Board could slip out under cover of darkness.to re-convene in Ife's basement. Stumpy attended the meeting, waiting quietly with rolls of drawings to show how to soften its utilitarian functionality. He had never actually seen a Wonder Building but, being from England, he assumed he knew much more about architecture than any group of "colonial hicks", as he had explained to his wife Morag. He correctly anticpated that Shaw and Shakespeare would not impress the Heritage Board, as it had done the Variance Board, so he'd come armed with exhibits.

But Stumpy had not counted on the issue of deafness. Among the many injuries suffered by the Board in site visits, by far the most devastating occured when Big Jake Mennon tossed a lit cigar stub into a trash pile inside the old Usher Mill building. Well, the Ushers had a deal with Billy Hillyard Sr., the Superintendent at Fort George, for safe storage of the rope wicks and black powder used for canon demonstrations on Friendly Fort Days. It happened that the Heritage Committee was inside the very store room housing seven kegs of black powder and four reels of wick for the Fort. The cigar stub was quick to make friends with a high speed smokeless variety of cordite wick bought cheap from the Lewiston Legionaires Gun Corps because of its instability. There shortly occured what firemen call a "flashover", followed by an ungodly boom and a black mushroom cloud visible from as far away as the Fort. Billy Hillyard would remark later how much it reminded him of the distant steam cloud over Niagara Falls, only black. Fortunatley, none of the Board members were killed but all lost their hair and most of their hearing. And none had any recollection whatever of the explosion, which lifted the entire roof from the old mill.

All of them being stone deaf, the Heritage Board couldn't hear a single word of Stumpy's letter as Big Jake Mennon read it aloud. Everyone sat in silence and looked at Stumpy Stump who took that to mean it was his turn to talk. He immediately unrolled his drawings and taped two of them on the wall in full view of the Board. As Stumpy turned back to face the Board he knew immediately something was terribly terribly wrong. Big Jake Mennon was on his feet. Jaak Mennon's face was so red his eyes were watering. What Stumpy did not know was that every member of the Heritage Board was also a member of the new Hell's Angels chapter, proud owners of the new Wonder Building inside the Usher Mill ruins. The Board made no connection between Stumpy's letter, Mother Teresa, or concepts of softening functionality. And Stumpy knew nothing of the Wonder Building in the old concrete mill. What happened next would cause Stumpy and Morag to eventually move back to England.